What’s Your Rainbow?
Though June was officially Pride month, Bellinghamsters always stretch this celebration out, like an old time rainbow taffy, made longer for more enjoyment.
How do you feel about all of the flags that have emerged over these past few years, recognizing so many underrepresented members of our culture?
Have you felt unseen or disregarded or censored in your life? What about your feeling life: are you able to express yourself in a satisfying way?
Check out this next installment of my story, Don't Make Me Laugh set in a land where smiling is required:
Dahlia runs away to her safe place, the sanctuary of the natural world outside her family home.
Where do you flee? I've taken refuge in bathrooms since forth grade, at least. I tore my ballet tights playing hopscotch, and bloodied my knee, but couldn't manage all of those feelings with an audience.
Blessed is the sacred bathroom.
It's been so enjoyable to get theatrical in this story book form, writing and drawing from the inspiration of how things feel. We've all felt stifled when it comes to emotional expression.
These feelings are like beach balls, pressed down under the water's surface, and they won't stay under there forever.
All those rainbow flags help me feel safer in this world. How can we ever have any fun if we don't get to feel safe? It's so uplifting to transition from fighting to celebrating, but how do we get there?
This next page of the tale was inspired by Glennon Doyle’s podcast, We Can Do Hard Things, where she vows to liberate herself from all of the complicit laughing she’s done. Once this notion came to consciousness for me, I tried to follow her lead. Dahlia does my scowling for me.
How many racist, sexist, homophobic “jokes” have we lived through, afraid to question the teller? Can we learn direct, kind ways to stand up for human decency?
This last page I’ll share today was my favorite picture to draw. I had to make my body perform the feelings of rage and frustration, then got to feel the delight in representing this with color and form.
I don’t actually enjoy feeling this way, but I strive to find the courage to express what’s real, in a cool, calm way, like the sanctuary of Dahlia’s cedar forest.
My nervous system told me long ago that I couldn’t physically fight for my feelings, unless I wanted to be squashed for good.
This illustration gave me a vehicle I didn’t have before.
So my theme continues, CREATIVITY HEALS! Let’s continue to look for ways to make our world more beautiful. It seems like this takes so much energy, but once you get started, you may find a bounty of resource, to do this work of expressing what’s in your heart.
